When are you getting married?

You know what my absolutely favorite thing in the world is?! Getting asked when I am going to get married. In Utah, it’s normal for people here to get married young, have a few kids and then get divorced. I’ve opted out of this tradition and chose to go to grad school instead.

That. Is. Not. Normal.

Or is it? I’ve lived in a few different places where getting knocked up young is more socially acceptable than getting married before you’re 30. These mormons have a timeline, they go on a mission at 18 for two years (sounds terrible) and then are usually married to one of the many honeys they pen-pal while they’re away within about a month or two of coming home. If they don’t they’re kind of viewed as broken, it’s sad. The women! They uhhh, are discrete and not very faithful while they are “waiting” on their missionaries. FYI, some of them like to take a vacation on the dark side (date a non-mormon person) from time to time. Kind of like a mormon Rumspringa if you will.

I digress… The usual response is, I don’t have any kids and I’ve never been married… To which they reply, you’ll find the right girl some day and you’ll settle down, have kids… blahblahlah…

I find this condescending.

I’m actually perfectly happy on my own and do quite well, the funny thing is… I’ve had many opportunities to get married and have even been engaged. I don’t believe in a god or gods but if I did I’d thank them every day for not letting that happen because they turned out to be terrible, awful people. I can’t imagine raising kids with them now, especially if they might eventually act like that in front of the kids or even worse ending up in a custody battle with them down the line… Even if it is just over my vinyl collection. Also, at this point, I don’t think it ever will get married and I’ve made peace with the fact that I love being a bachelor. I get to travel when I want, sleep in when I want and can essentially do whatever the hell I want 24/7.

I am too selfish to be a husband or parent.

There, I said it. Judge me… but at least I’m honest.

I just love the condescending attitude of some of these young couples that have life figured out, as if there’s something wrong with me because I don’t have 4 kids before I’m 25. Hell, the carbon footprint on that alone should make you feel guilty.

What is normal? I don’t know and respect whatever people want to do, that’s not the issue. I do however take issue with people trying to project their beliefs and traditions on me and treating me like an outsider when I don’t conform. Just because I’m different, it doesn’t make me an invalid.

I never liked koolaid that much anyway…


2 thoughts on “When are you getting married?

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